i had my artworks displayed on tuesday for the first time in my life, as a part of the "small apocalypse" exhibition. it was organized by the art group Lesmir and the dear people at the Nibiru gallery in ostrava. it was wonderful and i am very grateful.
for those who can't make it to ostrava within the next month, this was my special piece for the exhibition (apart from the embroidered photographs):
(untitled I.)
(imagine this in pink)
(untitled II.)
they are 3 A3 format pieces, blue, white and black ink on blue paper, black and blue ink on white paper, and white and blue ink on black paper. they function as separate pieces as well as a whole, a story, a comic strip. there are several recurring motives in them, some are easy to spot, some are not.
what I love most about it that every person that I showed it to liked a different thing about it.
they are for sale, separately and as a whole as well.
a recent discovery made me ponder over the use of all the photographs i have taken over the past 5 years. since they filled up more than two photo albums already, they are a great source of "raw" material to work with. i don't like drawing in them and i felt like there is something more physical in the way i could modify them.
so i started sewing. more than two of my friends inspired me to do this, they are excellent embroideresses. (yes, i just invented this word and i am sticking with it.)
i decided to use white thread - i do not trust myself with colors yet (since the photographs are colorful enough already) and black would be too intrusive, shadowy and sharp.
these are not all of the photographs i already embroidered, just a quick glimpse of what i think is ready to be viewed by more than me and my closest friends.
i call them "unseen forces" since they all represent various waves and patterns that seemingly hold together the reality captured in the shots.
the white thread functions as a fortifying element, intensifying the focus of the viewer and hiding he unwanted at the same time.
the white captures what i wish others would see as well.
Prednedávnom sme sa prechádzali po slamovom vystúpení s kamarátmi po nočnej Prahe. Jeden z nich je roztopašne výrečný extrovert. Podaril sa mu do monológu zakomponovať vtip o slovákoch, bola to taká tá bežná odroňská narážka typu "vy jste vlastně maďaři bez kukuřice." Nepamätám si ju úplne presne, vytesňujem tieto veci, veď už v Českej republike žijem cca 7 rokov a nejakú relatívne hrubú hrošiu kožu si človek vypestuje.
A div sa svete, tejto narážke sa to nepodarilo. Dostala sa pod kožu, lebo to bol človek mne blízky. A vytiekla slza.
Prečo?
Prečo musím ľuďom vysvetľovať, že nemajú právo smiať sa človeku, ktorý sa narodil v krajine, kde nechce žiť? Kde mu vlastná rodina radí, aby sa radšej odsťahoval čo najďalej, lebo politická situácia je z roka na rok horšia?
Zabolí to hlavne keď sa jedná o človeka, ktorý sa narodil na jednom mieste, počas celého detstva mal len jeden domov, jedných rodičov, jednu školu a teraz pracuje stále v jednej a tej istej krajine. Takže nemá tušenie, aké to je byť permanentný cudzinec.
Som imigrant.
Som utečenec. Nie vojnový, za toto privilégium som vďačná. Ale mám plné zuby domasedov, ktorí sa vysmievajú ľuďom čo sú neprávom odcudzení a nešťastní.
Nie som z tých čo berú slová na ľahkú váhu, pretože sú priamym odrazom toho, čo sa odohráva v mysli za nimi. Takže keď máš blbé kecy, nediv sa, že sa s tebou prestanem baviť.
i am emptying a jar of liquid that has been overflowing for a while now. as a delicate introvert, one has to find an output that reaches far yet stays unintrusive in its operation.
play while reading:
since i've come out as being polyamorous, i've met too many people who:
- took advantage of it
- assumed that for this reason i do not have emotions or i do not feel love and do not seek it
- thought that "sleeping around is a game" although i never would let such disgusting words escape from my mouth-hole and i consciously fight all power game thoughts that spring up in my brain for whatever reason they may
- thought that it means that i sleep with everyone that comes my way - thought that it is just a phase i am going through till i find the "right person" (oh do not get me even started on this one...)
- or simply had no clue as to how to behave towards me because i was making them nervous
all these troubles boil down to the basic conflict due to misunderstanding, however, this misunderstanding has various reasons:
- common human egotism and disrespect (who'da thought, huh..?)
- laziness of spirit, a.k.a. "why are you still whining about this?" and other statements that forced me to avoid any kind of communication about an issue since it was making the other party come out of their comfort zone
- "traditional" upbringing, where monogamy is upheld as some kind of holy grail, hence all other possible relationships are below it in means of quality
therefore, i have several declarations to make, in order to try to wipe out any more future misunderstandings:
- polyamory is love.
- i treat all my lovers with the same respect they have for me and cherish them completely.
- just because i am with this person right now does not mean that the one that is not present is somehow less important.
- do not fear the others, i would never be with someone who is not on good terms with the fact that i love other people. - if you are puzzled by anything concerning this particular type of intimacy, ask. i am more than delighted to explain and discuss. - definitions are important yet they should never be constricting and ultimating.
however, since i've been scarred, i have become fairly picky and prickly about the choice of my lovers and partners. polyamorous people have more boundaries since their wonderful significant others have their specific quirks, requirements and habits that make them what they are. and it is very hard to discern immediately whether some of these aren't toxic or permanent.
that's right, who you are with always influences your own personality so watch out for the contagious bad habits of your lovers, and if you know how, help them help themselves.
it is very tricky, exhausting, and dangerous. but the acknowledgement you get for recognizing and resolving an issue sometimes comes from places you would not even expect it to come.
we are taught to love more than one parent, more than one friend, why can't we love more than one partner?
_________________________________________________________ required reading for all interested in non-monogamy: Easton & Hardy - The Ethical Slut Dan Savage - Savage Love (weekly column) More Than Two
